She Refuses To Wear Her Engagement Because She Believes In Equality
A Reddit user shares he bought his fiance her “dream ring.” But she won’t wear it until she can give him an engagement present of equivalent value. She says it isn’t “fair” that men traditionally pay for their partner’s engagement ring.
His Finance Is Independent And Wants Equality
The original poster (OP) said his fiance was adamant that they split things evenly, especially when it comes to money. According to her, “men who float their female partners financially always ended up resenting them.”
His fiance’s parents had a “brutal divorce.” Her dad tried to rob her mother of assets since her mom was a homemaker.
So, OP can understand where her feelings are coming from. However, OP feels like his fiance is indirectly accusing him of at least being cable of doing the same thing to her.
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She Called It “Perfect” But Doesn’t Want To Wear It
OP’s fiance said she wanted to pay for her own ring and his because she didn’t think it was fair that men traditionally pay for their partner’s engagement ring. However, that didn’t stop OP from buying her the “dream ring” with the help of his sister.
OP’s fiance loved the engagement ring calling it “beautiful” and “perfect.” But she didn’t think it was right for her to wear it after learning how much OP spent on it.
So, she said she wouldn’t wear it until she could buy him an engagement present of equal value. Instead, she wears a gold band she purchased online until she can decide on a gift and save up for it.
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He Doesn’t Want Or Need Anything In Return
OP is furious he spent so much money on a ring just sitting in a box. And he doesn’t know how long that will last, considering he doesn’t want or need anything in return.
It also gets awkward among their friends and family when they see the simple gold band she wears. They think OP was “cheap” not buying her a traditional ring. And yet, when OP’s fiance tries to explain the reasoning, it worsens things.
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The Reddit Community Chimes In
Many Reddit users say OP is wrong for making the issue about him. They say he ignores where she derives her emotions, which is witnessing “the demise of her parent’s marriage and the aftermath.”
They add that the fiance wants to be more than just his wife. And she doesn’t want to feel like she’s taking from him where he can end up resenting her in the future.
A common recommendation in the community is for the two to seek couples counseling from a neutral third party. In addition, they should work on communicating with one another to help them move forward in their relationship.
Is OP wrong for being upset his fiance doesn’t want to wear the ring he spent a lot of money on? Or is OP taking everything too personally, forgetting her choices are coming from a place of pain and fear? Is there a compromise they can work together on? Or will this lead to more trouble for their relationship?
This article was produced and syndicated by Parent Portfolio.
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