His Views On “Gender Pay” Put Strain On Their Relationship

A Reddit user says her fiance has been job hunting and has been offered three different jobs but turned them all down because they don’t pay as well as hers. The last offer he received was considerably high for its role type. However, he turned it down cause it didn’t meet her significant salary.

They Both Started At The Same Company

The original poster (OP) and her fiance met when they worked at the same company. But OP was a contractor while her fiance was a full-time employee. 

Realizing that the full-time employees were making more money, OP left and looked for other job opportunities. Later, OP’s fiance left the company and found another job that paid the same as OP.

However, over time, OP got “let go” from her company and became unemployed for some time. Although OP had some savings and received unemployment, she depended on her fiance for most of her living expenses, such as groceries and eating.

After a few months, OP got a new job that paid “significantly better” than her previous jobs, which allowed her to help with her share of the expenses and treat her fiance out.

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Her Fiance Has Been Job Hunting

A month after OP got her new job, her fiance’s company shut down, leaving him jobless. Since then, he’s been job hunting and offered three jobs where the third job paid well for that specific role.

Unfortunately, he turned them all down because their offer wouldn’t pay as well as OP’s job. He would even “self-sabotage” his interviews by asking for “too much” although he is qualified and does well in the interview.

The fiance’s latest offer paid well for its role. And OP encouraged him to accept the position. However, it was still lower pay than OP’s job.

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Fiance Implies She Wants To Feel Superior

OP’s fiance was frustrated that she was “pushing him” to take a lower-paying job. He implied she wanted to feel superior by making a lot of money.

OP said that how much her fiance made didn’t matter to her. But he was still upset and said he deserved to make as much as her. So, according to him, it’s not fair for her to insist he takes a lower pay.

In the meantime, he’s still unemployed and dipping into his savings to stay afloat.

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The Masses Weigh In

Reddit users say OP’s fiance is letting his ego get in the way of providing value as a potential spouse. They also warn that his “insecure and pouty” characteristics are not signs of a “good man or partner.”

Another Reddit user said that taking a job doesn’t mean you’re stuck for life. Instead, accepting will allow him to continue his resume and networking to boost his career. Right now, he’s beginning to suffer financially and should not let his pride get in the way.

Is OP wrong for encouraging her fiance to take a lesser-paying job? Does OP want to be superior to her fiance by making significantly more money? Or is the fiance’s ego getting in his way of seeing that he’s hurting his relationship?