A Reddit user shares that his mom wants him and his sister to be co-trustees in their parent’s estate. But the original poster (OP) says he loves his sister, but they do not generally agree on much.
What’s The Problem?
The OP is an attorney and drafted his parents’ estate planning documents. All the proceeds at the end would be split 50/50 between him and his sister.
The OP is the sole trustee, while his sister is the backup. If the OP and his sister were to become co-trustees, they would need to make all decisions regarding liquidating assets and sign documents jointly.
OP tried explaining to his mother that having two trustees was unnecessary. And that it would just cause endless stress, time, and aggravation trying to agree with his sister to determine the best way to liquidate the assets.
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The OP is happy to change the estate documents to make his sister the sole trustee and allow her to make the decisions. He just wants to avoid the stress and time it would take if he and his sister did it jointly.
Sadly, the OP says his mother is furious and screaming at him for not agreeing to be a co-trustee with his sister. She even went as far as to accuse him of not loving her, being a bad son, and being disrespectful.
What Is A Son To Do?
The common response from most Reddit users was for the OP’s mother to find another attorney and let them explain it to her. They believe the mother may not know the difference between a beneficiary and a trustee, which is most likely causing all the confusion.
Another Reddit user shared an experience where they were involved in a co-trustee situation, and it didn’t go well. There was a conflict on how to liquidate the assets.
According to this user, one of the trustees ruined negotiations multiple times to sell a property. It took over a year to sell the property, and they sold it for $100,000 less than what they would have gotten if they had sold it to the first buyer.
Is OP being disrespectful for refusing to be a co-trustee with his sister? Does OP need to continue to explain the drawbacks of having more than one trustee? Or should the mother find another attorney?